Sir John A. Statue Speaks Out Against Bully Buses

"a deliberate, pugnacious conspiracy"

The Turnip

Charlottetown
January 23, 2012

Shortly after a near-miss with a runaway bus, Charlottetown's statue of Sir John A. MacDonald spoke out at a rare press conference today, decrying a 'campaign of tyranny' by sentient city buses against urban art.

Donning head protection, the bronze sculpture of "The Old Chieftain" used a savvy mix of political opportunism and the shrewd debating style that helped shape the nation's history. The effigy put forth a compelling argument that two runaway bus incidents, mere days apart, could hardly be coincidence:

"I'm a lure for tourism, not bullies."

"Using Occam's razor, we must conclude that those treasonous, mercenary vehicles have entered, of their own volition, a deliberate conspiracy, by force, by fraud, or by both, to force urban art into the Confederation Centre."

Across the street, Bluefin Bullet, a life-size sculpture of a Bluefin tuna, covered in scales made from stainless-steel spoons,  applauded Sir John A. statue's stance.

"We've lived in fear for some time now, but that last accident was truly terrifying. Urban art exhibits are people, too, and someone has to put the brakes on this movement."

"This is the last spike."

In a display of solidarity, Hydrant, a pop-art, oversized fireplug on St. Peters Road, also sported emergency head-gear.  Though unable to attend the media event, the fiesty installation piece announced the support of the city's fire engines, in the event that the situation escalates, claiming via 2-way radio, "We nearly lost Sir John A. This is the last spike."